D.I.Y. Missionary

28.09.2009

Fr Cairns tells us how 'crises' effect all of us and how the power of Christ is with us.

My vocation story is parallel to some of my high school friends. Some took marriage as just a rather ordinary, normal step in life. The marriage itself seemed to be no big deal. Only a few years later did the real meaning of living a family life become a reality. They faced a crisis. For some it was a matter of get out or re-start.

I choose the seminary

I chose the seminary in a somewhat similar fashion. I was called but didn't really realise the nitty-gritty of living as a missionary priest. I too was in crisis!  I had to make my decision - get out or re-start. On reflection I feel the second call was just as important as the first - perhaps more so.

My years in the Columban seminary still stand out as an atmosphere of warmth with the supporting fellowship of staff and fellow students. I was duly ordained at 24 and sent to Japan. I found the language tough, but had read that someone with 'cultural curiosity' could overcome the difficulty of language and adapt. I feel I adapted - I still like Japan. I still find the culture interesting.

My first placements on the Japanese mission were down in the south in desperately poor farming and fishing villages. I loved the work. Indeed I worked very hard to contact non-Christians. I was full of youthful energy doing most of the missionary work myself. I was a DIY missionary priest. Then suddenly I fainted and was taken off to hospital. I had beri-beri, with leg muscular problems.

In crisis mode

After nine months in hospital I was invalided back to Australia. I was devastated. I could no longer work as a missionary priest, so how could I possibly continue as one. Please notice how often I use the word 'work.'  As a young priest I was very much work oriented. I was now in crisis mode - stay or get out!

In this confused state I visited two of those high school friends and their wives. They shared the difficulties of their married lives. They had been through similar vocational crises. One evening at the home of one of these friends I was reading a bed-time story to their three year old twins, one on each lap. It struck me: these could have been mine!

What am I doing to give life?  This challenging question started me thinking about the real meaning of priesthood.

To ponder my decision I became half a chaplain half a patient at a big Home for the Aged in Newcastle, Australia. Influenza went through the Home. I was anointing five people a day. Meaningless rubbing of oil on people's heads repulsed me. What did it mean?  So I studied the meaning of sacraments. Then my heart was hit.

My second call

This was a relatively unspectacular hit, but hit it was. It definitely became my Damascus moment! I was 39 when I fell off my work horse. It was then that I received my second much stronger call to the missionary priesthood. This time I answered with deliberation and joy because I believed Jesus is Life and I am called to communicate that Life to others as His instrument.

So for me the Japanese word for crisis (kiki) has a special significance. It is made up of two characters. One by itself means 'danger,' the other 'opportunity,' joined together gives 'crisis.'  How true for me!

My life now became a journey with meaning and taste. It's life-giving. After the hospital with its second call I served as Spiritual Director in the Australian Columban seminary for 13 years. At 52 I returned to the Japanese mission and am still there.

Depending on the Lord

I have just outlined my main crisis call as a missionary priest, but there are minor calls every day and a major one on an average of every 10 years. I am sure you readers of The Far East have similar experiences!

I look back on my life and realise that when I tried to go it alone I got discouraged and life became meaningless.

By 'alone' I mean without depending on the Lord who gives those calls and together with the call, strength to follow it. I now work with Christ as his instrument, not his pleni-potentiary. As a consequence,

I work with my people, rather than for them.

A Japanese expert at brush calligraphy, who had once been in my youth group, asked me what words I would like for a scroll she intended to give me for my Golden Jubilee as a priest. I chose the words of St Paul in 2 Corinthians, "It is when I am weak that I am strong, because the power of Christ is with me."

I realise that this has been the essence of my life as a missionary priest.

Fr Barry Cairns first went to Japan in 1956.

Read more stories from The Far East, October